What’s the worst that can happen?
“No I can’t do that.” “How do you know? Did you ask?”
“Oh no, I can’t ask.” “What if they say no?”
Is this a conversation that goes on in your mind? Last week I was at the beach with a friend. Her condo was pool side not beach side. Which really is not a big deal and definitely not a deal breaker; still as we were sitting on the balcony about half way through the week I realized for most of the week the parking lot had not been full, after all it was after Labor Day the official end of summer. I said next year we should see what it would cost to see if we could switch to a beach side room. Then we looked at each other and said “Nah, probably not.”
The next morning I was out on the beach when my friend came down and joined me. “Guess what?” she said. “I went and talked to the Office Manager. Know what she said?” “That if they had an empty room when we check in next year she’ll be happy to give it to us, and if we had asked this year one of the penthouses was empty and she would have put us up there.”
Yes we had a good laugh and also talked about the lesson we learned. Just ask! After all, it’s not as though they would take our room away from us if they said no. And not having the room this year didn’t change our enjoyment, and if we don’t get one next year it won’t stop us from going. It just means when we have coffee in the morning we’ll be overlooking the beach and while it’s great, not doing it isn’t that important.
Often times we are so afraid of no that we don’t take the risk and just ask. Sure this was a little ask, and little asks help build our confidence to make bigger asks. So start asking and see what happens.
A hint, asking is not demanding. An ask is a request, one that recognizes that yes must be freely given. A demand expects yes, though the yes may not be freely given.
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Jane works with CEOs, Partners, Principals and Executives who are looking for Clarity, Focus and Release. My clients and colleagues call me a thought provoking Business Therapist. My focus is helping overwhelmed executives regain clarity, let go of ambiguity, uncertainty and fear, while bringing focus to their goals and objectives. I ask the hard questions knowing that you’re ready to answer them.
Jane is also the author of Put Your Big Girl Panties On and Kick Your Fears in the Ass.
Additional information is available at www.lovasconsulting.com. Contact Jane by email jlovas@lovasconsulting.com or by telephone at 703.594.6028.